How To Make The News

Well, the news in the doctors office that is.

You know how, when you have a baby crawling on the floor, you try to keep the tiny things picked up because they like to put everything in their mouths?

Well take it from a pro…

When they are preschool age, you should still keep these tiny things, not only off the floor but completely out of their reach.

Why?

So, they don’t stick them in their ears.

Yup, you heard that right.

Kyna came to me and said, “Mom, can you get this out of my ear.”

I looked in his ear.

Nope. I don’t think I can get that out.🤨

”Kyna, why is that in your ear?!”

”Because, it was my ear rings. I had one in the other ear too but I could get that one out.”

Kenzie’s bean bag chair has a hole, so we have these tiny foam balls floating around here, and that is what he used for ear rings.

Alright… I start brainstorming…

A tweezers! Aha!

Nope, the end of the tweezers was much too large for a tiny ball in his tiny ears. I managed to push it farther back tho. Oh, shoot!😳

Plan B. Suction! Yes! But what to use?

You know those dropper things that come with kids medicine? I tried using one of those but the suction it created wasn’t powerful enough.

Now I’m actually starting to freak out a bit cuz I really don’t know if I’ll be able to get this thing out!

Suction… what else causes suction?

The vacuum. Aha!

Don’t laugh. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

And before you question my parenting abilities please know that I tried it on my ear first.😎 It didn’t feel all that great but it didn’t suck my eardrum our either.

Nope, it didn’t work.

I’m guessing that one doesn’t need an explanation… you know large vacuum tube, versus tiny ear is pretty much destined to equal zero results.

I didn’t think about it at the time so I didn’t try this one but I’ll put it out there for you to try if you ever find yourself in my situation.

Put a straw in the ear and suck on it. Ew, I know, but at least its a cost free solution. Let me know if it works. I have high hopes for that one.

Plan C.

I called Checkers.

He laughed.

Here I am with this big gigantic problem and he laughed. (Actually I guess in reality it was actually a teeny tiny problem.)🤨

He was no help.

Plan D.

Google. Yea google rarely lets me down.

Flush it out with water, google said.

Unfortunately this tiny ball wasn’t in the mood swim and simply sat there stubbornly.

Plan E.

Ignore it.

I sent Kyna off to play while I went back to what I had been doing.

Yea this should work, surely it would just drop out eventually right?

Wrong.

Plan F.

Checkers came home and he took a turn ear fishing for foam balls. Because you know, maybe he’s better at it then I was.

Turns our the only thing he was better at was pushing it even deeper.🤦‍♀️

Plan G.

Let the professionals handle it.

This is the plan I knew wouldn’t fail but was also hoping not to use.

I mean seriously, a Dr bill for removing something from my child’s ear?!🙈

I called them hoping they could help and would not send me to the E.R.

Let me check with the nurse the receptionist said.

😳 Not really what I wanted to hear.

“Bring him in.”they said.

Turns out we were some kind of learning experience for the whole office, I believe, as we had a total of four people weighing in on this ‘how to remove things from a kids ear 101.’ And that doesn’t even include the receptionist who was also very interested in this event.

The Dr did assure me tho, that this happens quite a bit. “You know it’s just kids learning about their bodies, figuring out what works and what doesn’t.”

Well I’m hoping Kyna figured out that this definitely does NOT work. Although from his perspective it might seem like it did considering all the attention, sticker and lollipop that he got.🙃

The Dr told us that when he worked in the pediatric wing of the hospital they had a jar with all the things in it that they removed from kids noses and ears.🤷‍♀️😂

I realized soon after we were in the room, that the Dr and nurses weren’t very confident that they would be successful in getting this thing out.

Well that’s quite reassuring.

The nurse used a bottle of water with a tiny tube attached to it, squirted it into his ear and that stubborn ball floated right out.

As soon as it was out she set down her water bottle, yanked open the door, held both thumbs high in the air and exclaimed, “It’s out!”

The nurse’s station erupted with cheers and clapping and I realized for the first time that literally every person working in there was aware of why we were there and waiting to hear the outcome.🤦‍♀️

Talk about making the front page.🙈

So much for not liking the spotlight. Kids… they’ll make sure you get noticed.😆

Afterwords the dr told me that they decided that they’d take a shot at getting it out but if they failed, they weren’t going to charge us and would have sent us to the E.R.

Well, I was mighty glad they tried because tho it cost us $71, they saved us time and money by not sending us to the E.R.

So there, consider yourself warned, and hide anything that might fit in your child’s nose or ear.🙃

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