Focus on God not Your Shortcomings

This is something God taught me during our DTS.

Last week God reminded me about this again.

So I thought, you know what, I’d better write it down before I forget it again!

You know, we serve a really amazing God, even though he has to teach us the same thing repeatedly, he doesn’t walk away, he just keeps on loving us and when we need him to remind us again he does, he’s there… ready… waiting… even though he could say… we’ve been over this already… a few times to be exact….

I’ve said that to my three year old, well not that exactly but close…

“but why can’t I?” she asks.

“Because… (I give her the reason)”

“Oh….               but why can’t I?” she asks… again…

“because… (I give her the reason AGAIN)

“It would be awesome! Why can’t I? She says.

“Kenz, we’ve talked about this and I said NO!”

Yep, there you’ve got it, thats how long I last before my patience runs out and while its a bit hard on my pride to compare myself to a three year old, I often feel like that’s exactly where I am in my spiritual walk, constantly questioning and doubting Gods plans for me, even though he has proved himself trustworthy. He’s never let me down. Yes, he is a patient God.

Ok, that was a short bunny trail off the main subject, you know I have these blogs all written out in my head but when I start typing its like my thoughts run off course and the end product rarely looks anything like it was visualized in the beginning:)

Ok, moving on… again…

A few years ago a wise woman of God said… “God tends to keep me up at night if he wants me to pray for someone.”

I think God used her to speak to me right then, because over that time I had been randomly waking up at night and was unable to fall asleep again. I found this really annoying but had no clue what to do about it. So, I tried it… Lying awake one night when I should have been sleeping, I asked, “Ok God, who do u want me to pray for?

It amazes me the people God brings to mind that I then get to pray for. It can be people in my life currently or people I haven’t seen for years. It also amazes me how often God tells me to pray for myself during these nighttime awakenings… I mean… what? You said me? What in the world do I need to pray about that I didn’t already cover?

Yea about that…

He usually comes up with more issues in my life to pray about then i’ll ever admit… 🙂

It’s an amazing experience sometimes though…

While Checkers was in Nepal last spring, I was sleeping one night and trust me I was sleeping good, when I suddenly woke up. It was the weirdest feeling ever because I went from a deep sleep to being wide awake. I felt this urgency but I really had no idea why.

“God, who am I supposed to pray for?”

“Pray for Checkers and his team.”

So I did, and I think before I was even done, I was sleeping again. I woke up the next morning and quite vividly remembered this rather strange experience. So I went downstairs with the intention of messaging Checkers and asking him what went wrong last night. ( I should maybe mention that Nepal is, exactly ( I think) a 12 hr time difference from here so my midnight was his noon.) Anyway… I already had a message from Checkers. He sent a video of a building collapsing…. They were trying to knock down a wall on the 2nd floor of a building but when the wall went the floor (that they were standing on) went with it. No one was seriously hurt, just a bit bruised.

Do you think I got chills? Yea… I did…

Ok, that was another bunny trail…

Last week one night, I couldn’t sleep…

I already knew what to pray, because its something I pray for ALL THE TIME lately.

Patience with Kenzie. It seems no matter how hard I try, I run out long before the day is over. I think her love language is quality time and since Kynaston joined our family I just don’t have quite as much time to spend with her, and she feels it. It comes out in all kinds of crazy, hard to tolerate ways:) So, I pray for patience.

No.

I PLEAD for patience.

Then, God reminded me.

The answer to every situation is a closer connection to God.

Since, my asking for patience seemed to go unheard, was that really the issue?

I know this, but I forget… repeatedly….

Faith is NOT the results of works, but works is the results of faith.

So the closer I walk with Jesus, the more my life will reflect him.

So, I think I need more patience, but what I really need is more of JESUS!

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