Rewriting The Lyrics

“Hallelujah, it rains on everything! Hallelujah Jesus is king!”

Those were the words that Kyna was singing with much enthusiasm.

I was busy painting and only half listening to the shenanigans of the kids around me, but my sub-conscious kept picking up on the fact that something was off with this song.

As, I hummed the song to myself I found the problem…

Hallelujah, he reigns ore everything! Hallelujah, Jesus is king!

God has written the story of your life. It’s a story of redemption. Of love. Of hope. Of beauty from ashes.

The devil has his own agenda for your life. It’s one of death. Of hate. Of defeat. Of turning beauty to decay.

You can follow whomever you want. The choice is yours.

When the devil sings songs of death, will you rise above it and rewrite the lyrics to those of life?

When he chants defeat, will you claim victory?

As I wrestled through some demonic mind games recently, I asked God, “What do you have to say about this?”

His answer: “The devil is like an evil TV commercial. If you don’t like what you see, you have the option of turning it off.”

You see, we have some pretty strict TV policies in place at our house.

We don’t have cable, but we have an antenna that allows us to watch football games. Each game is watched with a remote in hand and those eye widening, fear causing commercials are not given a voice in our house. They are promptly with no second guessing turned off before they even have a chance to influence our lives.

That is how powerless the devil is in the life of a Christian. When he flaunts stories of rejection, fear, could happens, and ‘you will never beat these things’ through your mind, you have the option of simply flipping the channel.

You have the option to refuse to view the garbage that he’s throwing at you.

You simply turn of your thoughts and focus on Jesus. Because he already won the battle. He settled it all on the cross. He gave his life for our redemption.

The devil lost and Jesus declared his victory with 3 simple words.

”It is finished.”

 

 

How To Make The News

Well, the news in the doctors office that is.

You know how, when you have a baby crawling on the floor, you try to keep the tiny things picked up because they like to put everything in their mouths?

Well take it from a pro…

When they are preschool age, you should still keep these tiny things, not only off the floor but completely out of their reach.

Why?

So, they don’t stick them in their ears.

Yup, you heard that right.

Kyna came to me and said, “Mom, can you get this out of my ear.”

I looked in his ear.

Nope. I don’t think I can get that out.🤨

”Kyna, why is that in your ear?!”

”Because, it was my ear rings. I had one in the other ear too but I could get that one out.”

Kenzie’s bean bag chair has a hole, so we have these tiny foam balls floating around here, and that is what he used for ear rings.

Alright… I start brainstorming…

A tweezers! Aha!

Nope, the end of the tweezers was much too large for a tiny ball in his tiny ears. I managed to push it farther back tho. Oh, shoot!😳

Plan B. Suction! Yes! But what to use?

You know those dropper things that come with kids medicine? I tried using one of those but the suction it created wasn’t powerful enough.

Now I’m actually starting to freak out a bit cuz I really don’t know if I’ll be able to get this thing out!

Suction… what else causes suction?

The vacuum. Aha!

Don’t laugh. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

And before you question my parenting abilities please know that I tried it on my ear first.😎 It didn’t feel all that great but it didn’t suck my eardrum our either.

Nope, it didn’t work.

I’m guessing that one doesn’t need an explanation… you know large vacuum tube, versus tiny ear is pretty much destined to equal zero results.

I didn’t think about it at the time so I didn’t try this one but I’ll put it out there for you to try if you ever find yourself in my situation.

Put a straw in the ear and suck on it. Ew, I know, but at least its a cost free solution. Let me know if it works. I have high hopes for that one.

Plan C.

I called Checkers.

He laughed.

Here I am with this big gigantic problem and he laughed. (Actually I guess in reality it was actually a teeny tiny problem.)🤨

He was no help.

Plan D.

Google. Yea google rarely lets me down.

Flush it out with water, google said.

Unfortunately this tiny ball wasn’t in the mood swim and simply sat there stubbornly.

Plan E.

Ignore it.

I sent Kyna off to play while I went back to what I had been doing.

Yea this should work, surely it would just drop out eventually right?

Wrong.

Plan F.

Checkers came home and he took a turn ear fishing for foam balls. Because you know, maybe he’s better at it then I was.

Turns our the only thing he was better at was pushing it even deeper.🤦‍♀️

Plan G.

Let the professionals handle it.

This is the plan I knew wouldn’t fail but was also hoping not to use.

I mean seriously, a Dr bill for removing something from my child’s ear?!🙈

I called them hoping they could help and would not send me to the E.R.

Let me check with the nurse the receptionist said.

😳 Not really what I wanted to hear.

“Bring him in.”they said.

Turns out we were some kind of learning experience for the whole office, I believe, as we had a total of four people weighing in on this ‘how to remove things from a kids ear 101.’ And that doesn’t even include the receptionist who was also very interested in this event.

The Dr did assure me tho, that this happens quite a bit. “You know it’s just kids learning about their bodies, figuring out what works and what doesn’t.”

Well I’m hoping Kyna figured out that this definitely does NOT work. Although from his perspective it might seem like it did considering all the attention, sticker and lollipop that he got.🙃

The Dr told us that when he worked in the pediatric wing of the hospital they had a jar with all the things in it that they removed from kids noses and ears.🤷‍♀️😂

I realized soon after we were in the room, that the Dr and nurses weren’t very confident that they would be successful in getting this thing out.

Well that’s quite reassuring.

The nurse used a bottle of water with a tiny tube attached to it, squirted it into his ear and that stubborn ball floated right out.

As soon as it was out she set down her water bottle, yanked open the door, held both thumbs high in the air and exclaimed, “It’s out!”

The nurse’s station erupted with cheers and clapping and I realized for the first time that literally every person working in there was aware of why we were there and waiting to hear the outcome.🤦‍♀️

Talk about making the front page.🙈

So much for not liking the spotlight. Kids… they’ll make sure you get noticed.😆

Afterwords the dr told me that they decided that they’d take a shot at getting it out but if they failed, they weren’t going to charge us and would have sent us to the E.R.

Well, I was mighty glad they tried because tho it cost us $71, they saved us time and money by not sending us to the E.R.

So there, consider yourself warned, and hide anything that might fit in your child’s nose or ear.🙃

Hide and Seek The King Way

The kids were entertained with an epic game of hide and seek, and I was entertained by watching them.

I walked into the mudroom and found Kenz, who’s legs were fully visible but her upper body was hidden by the jackets hanging there. I was immediately shushed when I talked to her. Whoops, I had no idea that was a hiding place.🤷‍♀️

Myles sat in the middle of the leaving room floor and pulled a blanket over his head. Yup. The rest of his body was completely visible, not that it mattered though, because as soon as Kenzie walked into the room, he jumped up and shouted, “Found!”😂

I think he might have a faint idea of what’s going on.

And now for best part…

Kenzie was ‘it’ and I quite literally snickered to myself when I heard her counting: 48, 49, 50 Thank you Jesus. Amen.

I don’t know if this is how they always play the game or if she somehow got distracted and thought she was praying. Either way, I found it funny.😆

 

 

 

Why Do We Buy Toys?

Its January 2nd.

Less then two weeks ago, we started a slow but almost complete overhaul on our play room.

Before the Christmas gifts started rolling in, I went through all the toys and got rid of everything except the favorites: Matchbox cars and tracks and Kenzie’s doll stuff. Everything else left.

Now they have a toy room full of brand new toys…

However, these toys are currently lonely and unemployed while the kids have been entertained for the last hour or more with grocery bags.

Yup, grocery bags.

Yup, they were free.

I’ve always been fascinated with how a kid’s imagination takes over when you give them things to play with that have no specific shape or purpose. But when you give them toys that only do one thing, they get tired of them rather quickly.

And there you have it. A peek at the thoughts rambling through my mind.

I’m wondering what would happen if I got rid of all our toys?😳🤷‍♀️😅

 

Being A Christian Does Not Equal Passivity.

What if I told you…

That I walked into church this morning and felt suddenly angry at how cold the church has become. As I compared what we call church compared to the church in Acts, I felt this anger rise up inside of me and I declared “We can do better then this! We have turned God’s house into a market place for selling our multi-level marketing products, we have turned it into a fashion show, we have turned into something, anything but a place of prayer and worship to the one true God.”

Many people would probably tell me that a true Christian would never raise their voice but would rather submit calmly and lovingly to the church.

Jesus wasn’t calm and he sure didn’t seem loving when he defended the temple (God’s house) in the Bible.

John 2:15 New International Version (NIV)

15 So he made a whip out of cords, and drove all from the temple courts, both sheep and cattle; he scattered the coins of the money changers and overturned their tables.

What if I told you…

That a year ago I wrote songs declaring that I am the king of the world, but now I’ve had a change of heart and am writing songs declaring ‘Jesus is King!’

“False prophet.” Many would declare. “There’s no way someone can change like that, there’s definitely a catch somewhere!”

The Apostle Paul did. He went from killing Christians to becoming one and he ended up writing a large portion of the Bible.

What if I told you…

That today someone tried to get me to engage in gossiping, it was minor gossip, nothing to vicious. Yet I saw clearly the web of lies that the devil was trying to spin, I saw the relationships that he wanted to destroy, so I turned to the gossiper and said, “I will not fall for your tricks satan!”

“A true Christian would never be so unloving!” The critics yell. “Jesus treated everyone so well! Even the woman caught in adultery!”

His response to Peter in Matthew 16:23 would definitely discredit his Christianity in today’s church:

23 But he turned, and said unto Peter, Get thee behind me, Satan: thou art an offence unto me: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but those that be of men.

I have not yet mentioned how he responded to the Pharisees…

13-14 You Pharisees and teachers of the Law of Moses are in for trouble! You’re nothing but show-offs. You lock people out of the kingdom of heaven. You won’t go in yourselves, and you keep others from going in.[b]

I’m fairly certain that in today’s circles Jesus would be told “Judge not!” Or “Nobody’s perfect!”

The truth is I have no plans on doing any of the above mentioned things, (also they are simply illustrations and not my actual thoughts or actions, just to be clear.)🙃 and I am well aware that we cannot see the hearts of men as Jesus could but still… we are called to live like him:

1 John 2:6 New International Version (NIV)

Whoever claims to live in him must live as Jesus did.

I am also aware that a deeper study could probably be done on these verses an I could probably be told that I used them out of context.

None of that is really the point though…

The point is:

If we study the life of Jesus, he didn’t live a passive life, he was loving, yes, but he wasn’t passive. He wasn’t a pushover.

The church today wants to be comfortable, we don’t want the confrontation, the ugly or the messy. We want nice, and comfortable with good coffee. (No worries, I love coffee.) 😎 We want to be placated, we want to told we’re doing well without repenting, without dying to self.

And I wonder: if Jesus walked into our church and started casting out demons, prophesying and healing the sick, would we recognize him or would we proclaim him to be too radical? Would we proclaim that what he is doing is the devils work?

Because when evil and good collide it isn’t peaceful. It isn’t pretty. It is a spiritual battle that often manifests into our physical world.

I believe that God wants to turn his church back into an ‘Acts kind of church’ and I believe that most of the opposition to this move is coming not from the world but from the people inside the church who want to be comfortable.

Because to the lost Jesus offers hope, peace and freedom in ways they have never before experienced.

To the church he is a threat to our systems, our beliefs and our perfect facades that hide our brokenness.

I love our church guys, and I know there’s many good churches out there. I am not church bashing here. I am simply saying that we have drifted far from the passion that the early church carried and I believe that God wants to bring it back.

Will we stand in his way, or are we willing to let go of our ideas, our rules and our systems and fully, completely surrender to what he wants to do?

 

Raising A Professional Negotiator

“Kyna, do you want chocolate chips or a candy brick?” I asked. It’s a thing around here: for quiet time they always get about 10 chocolate chips but occasionally there’s other sweet things around, which is why he gets too choose today.

”Yes!” He says. “Chocolate chips and a brick!”

Me: 🤦‍♀️

“Kyna, you need to choose one.”

”Ok.” He says. “I’ll take grape juice.”

🙄 I can hear the grin on his voice but still…🤦‍♀️

Someday… maybe he’ll be able to convince the government of some closed country that bringing in Bibles should be allowed.

Maybe, he’ll have the grit and determination to be avidly involved in tearing down regional strongholds.

Someday… he will go places with his determination to color outside the lines.

Someday… his refusal to conform to man’s standards will take him to greater heights then the average person will go.

Someday…

But right now…

I might just pull a few hairs out. 🤨

Unless, I keep my eyes on that someday and recognize that this personality type is the very one that will leave the biggest impact on the world.

Because it will not be swayed, it will not be stopped. Opposition is its fuel rather then its deterrent.

Our job as his parents isn’t to force him to conform but rather to teach him how to use and control this strength/weakness for the greater good.

As for me… I’m learning how to be his unmovable brick wall while also allowing him to forge a few tunnels through this brick wall.🤨

It’s a hard balance to find😎

Lemongrass Spa

Beware… this is not the kind of blog I normally write.

There. You’ve been warned. Proceed with caution. It might cost you. Literally.😆

It’s a long story but here’s the short version…

4+ years ago I was pregnant and had gestational diabetes. The doctors said: some woman just get it, everyone’s body is different. Nothing u can do about it.

Nope.

There is ALWAYS a solution. I am convinced. So I researched. And I found solutions. And I had another pregnancy that was gestational diabetes free which they say is highly unlikely if you’ve had it before.

I think someone should introduce doctors to google😎

Through all this research, I learned a lot about what happens to our bodies if we eat sugar, processed foods and use chemical laden body care products. And that’s just the start.

So, I’ve slowly been switching over to all natural products, but that gets pretty expensive!🤨

Which is why I signed up to be a Lemongrass Spa consultant and why I’m writing this blog.

(Whew, finally she gets to the point!)👏👏

Lemongrass sets some starting goals for you and if you reach them, there’s rewards for not only me but also for Rhoda, who I signed up under, so let’s help Rhoda out! Ha, see what I did there?😎

My first goal is to reach $500 in sales by November 30th.

This is where I need your help…

• If you place an order of $25 or more with me by November 30th, you will automatically get a small prize!

• If we get 1/2 way there… $250 in sales. I will turn this into a mystery hostess deal and someone will be the lucky winner!

• If you wish to place an order u can text or call me at 717-490-0493

Thank you for your support!

Band-aids Fix Everything

Owwwwwww!!

Mom, my toe hurts really bad! Can I have a band-aid?

That was Kyna.

Me: “Is it bleeding?”

“No, but it really hurts!”

”Ok, but ONLY one.” I said.

A couple seconds later he’s back with a band-aid, and is asking me to help him.

I open it and am ready to put it on his foot… but he is busy… searching for his ouchie.🤨

He pulls each one of his toes out, this missing ouchie is between two toes but we aren’t sure which ones any more.🤦‍♀️

Well it mustn’t be too bad if he can’t even find it. I’m thinking.

And then…

He starts searching on the other foot.🤔

This ouchie is very mysteriously elusive😅

I’m getting tired of standing here waiting while he searches so I exclaim: “OH! There it is!”

Kyna: “Where?”

“Right there!” I said as I quickly stuck the band-aid on a random spot on his foot before he had a chance to determine if I really did find this elusive ouchie.

”Oh yea.” He said as he patted the band-aid, then went on his merry way.

What can I say? 🤷‍♀️ I’m a mom, I excel at finding missing things!😂

A Day In The Life Of Myles

As told by Myles: age 1 year and 10 months.

This morning I crawled out of bed at 6:15. I made my way noisily down the stairs, sent the door crashing into the wall, jumped off the last step with a shout of glee, then turned around and slammed the door shut so hard that it bounced open again.

Oh, well no big deal, obviously I just need to slam it a little harder!

The second slam, however, is stopped short by mom’s hand and she closes it gently while whispering rather loudly “shhhhhh!!! Gently!!!!!”

You see, she thinks kids should stay in bed till at least 7, so her goal is to not wake anyone else.

Crazy, right?! I mean there is things to do, people to see and messes to make. We waste way to much time on this sleep thing, I’m convinced.

I’m up. Now… on to breakfast. I open the fridge door and start removing things till I find the yogurt. For some reason someone stowed it way in the back.🙄 I’m almost to it tho when mom intervenes again and she’s saying something about playing with toys till everyone else gets up then we’ll all eat together.

Oh well, there is plenty of things to explore around here. I’ll start in the bathroom. I have mastered the skill of crawling up onto the toilet then I can lean/balance against the edge of the sink and turn the water on. At this point anything is game for a good washing, all it takes is a whole lotta soap and a bit of water. Mom doesn’t approve of most of the things I choose to wash but she makes the biggest scene when I wash things with batteries in them. She says those toys shouldn’t get wet.

Who knew?🤷‍♀️

Toilets are fun too. There’s water in them which is also good for washing things. Oh and they flush. Have you ever taken the time to watch the water do it’s crazy, swishy thing? You should try it sometime. You know, enjoy the small things.

I mostly avoid the toilets tho. Mom makes a big deal out of me playing in the sink but when she catches me in the toilet… well… I usually end up sitting in the stroller for awhile while she over uses words such as yuck! And gross! She says toilet water is dirty.

Who knew?🤷‍♀️

I guess sink water isn’t dirty?

Interesting.

She couldn’t find her phone one day and guess what she did when Kyna  told her that I had it? She checked all the toilets.

Really mom?

Even I know that phones are meant for videos and not to wash in toilets. And in case you’re wondering: I accidentally left her phone in the basement.

I’m famished and in serious need of food by the time mom finally says, “Hey guys come eat!” There’s a plate waiting for me at the table so I waste no time in getting there, halfway there tho I remember that I need a spoon (cuz mom always forgets) so I make a quick detour to the spoon drawer, then finally I’m settled into my booster and ready to dig into my…

EGGS!!😫 my extreme hunger is suddenly gone.

I shove my plate across the table at an incredible rate of speed because we all know that yogurt is the only acceptable breakfast food.

Mom gets my plate sets it in front of me and says No! I get it, shoving plates is even less tolerable the not getting yogurt for breakfast. I pout for 5 min then realize that if I’m eating eggs I’ll need a fork not a spoon so I climb down and switch out my utensils. I eat my eggs in record time then take my plate to mom and ask for more.

You know what she does? She sets a plate of yogurt on the table.

And I thought yogurt was off the menu this morning. Oh well I guess I have to retrieve that spoon I put back.

After we got back from dropping Kenz off at school, Kyna and I stayed in the garage to play. I crawled onto the roof of the SUV. Why? You might ask. Because the windshield makes an incredible sliding board!

My fun is cut short tho, when Kyna hollers, “ Mom! Myles is on the car!”

Seriously?! There is so many things wrong with this picture. It seems Kyna has some kind of ‘keep Myles off the car pact’ with mom, which is weird since he’s the one who taught me to do it!🤨

I manage to quickly slide down the hood onto the floor and look mostly innocent by the time mom appears. Seems she isn’t fooled easily though because she says: Myles. Stay down or house. Translation: if I get on the car again I will be banned to the house and all garage fun will come to an abrupt halt.

Got it. Car sliding = more trouble then worth.

Kyna and I eventually head inside to find better things to do. I picked up a match box car and hurled it threw the air. Because, you know, balls aren’t the only things that are throwable. Problem is, the car hit mom. She looked a bit irritated and buckled me into my stroller. She does that when I do things I shouldn’t. Sure I can’t throw things while I’m sitting in here but she doesn’t seem to know that as soon as I’m out I can do it again.

I’m out! Can anyone say FREEDOM!!

Now to prove my point… I pick up the closest toy and threw it. Yup, I hit mom again. Yup, I’m back in the stroller.

It’s about an hour later and I’m sitting in the stroller again for the 5th time… or is it the 6th? Honestly, I’m losing track, all I know is I’m getting awfully tired of sitting in here and I starting to rethink the whole throwing things idea. I’m starting to think it’s not worth it.

I’m out! And I will not be throwing things. Nope, not worth it. I’ll gonna explore the bathroom instead.

My plans are cut short, however, when mom sees where I’m headed and says: “Myles, stroller?”

Seriously?! I let my shoulders sag, stomp my foot and sigh audibly as I change directions and head for the play room.

Like I said: Sitting in that stroller gets old pretty fast. Who invented those things anyway?

And then it’s nap time.

Worst. Part. Of. The. Day.

Mom put me in my crib and went downstairs.

Does she really think I’m going to stay in here? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

I head to the bathroom, crawl up on the toilet then shove the basket of washcloths on the floor. I get back down and put all those wash clothes in the toilet. Next I open the drawer and explore it’s contents. There’s a couple things in there that should be in the toilet, so I take care of that.

I hear the door at the bottom of the steps open so I race to my crib, giggling the whole way. I quickly crawl up the side and dive head first onto the mattress. By the time mom gets there, I’m snuggled up on my pillow with a big grin.

Yea, I’m pretty sure she has no idea I ever left my crib.🤫

Now if I can look innocent enough she’ll leave again, then I can go explore that second drawer.

Unfortunately she tucks me in again and lays on the bed.

🤔 maybe she wasn’t fooled after all cuz she only does that when she sees a need to make sure I stay in bed.

Oh, well guess I might as well sleep then cuz trust me there’s no breaking out of cribs when she’s around.

Yup, just tried it and she mentioned that dreadful stroller. I’ll take the crib any day so sleep it is!

Good Night guys!

P.S. If you want to try car sliding or toilet splashing stop by anytime, I would be honored to teach you how!

 

Things Change When You Think Backwards

Did you ever Wonder why God likes doing things backwards?

He tends to use a boomerang affect to get what he wants rather then a direct approach.

• For starters… rather then saying things outright, he used parables. I’ve got a vague understanding of this but I’m still trying to fully understand why he did this. I’ll blog about it once I figure it out.🙃

• He tells us that the key to reaping abundantly is to give abundantly. This does not make sense by human standards, because if u take things away it does not add up! (Pun intended)😆 That’s not how my math teacher taught it anyway.🙃

2 Corinthians 9:6-8

Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.

• Then there’s this verse…

16 So the last shall be first, and the first last: for many be called, but few chosen. Matthew 20:16

Again, it goes against the ways of the world… rather then striving for the top, we get there instead by simply abiding in Christ and dying to self.

• Jesus left his mark on earth by serving. He was leader who led by serving.

For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:45

He is the leader who gives choices, rather then orders. Again, it’s rather backwards from the standards of the world.

But here’s my revelation…

Do you ever know something in your head but you don’t feel it in your heart?

That’s where I was with this subject and just recently as I prayed into it, I had this epiphany that took my head knowledge and made it heart knowledge.

I realized that I was easily swayed by the opinion of man so obviously I’m not very secure in my identity in Christ. Right?

But how to overcome it?

I searched the Bible high and low for verses on who God says that I am.

I found many, but none of them changed my perspective.

Until one day, when I had this epiphany.

I realized that to walk fully in my identity as a daughter of the king, I need to understand who he is! Not who I am.

So, I searched the Bible high and low for verses on who God is.

I can’t explain this backward philosophy that God teaches, but I know, for sure, that it works.

When I realize that he is the overcomer, I also realize that I don’t need to fight my own battles because he already won the race.

When I realize that he is the king of Kings, the Lord of Lords, the first and the last, the alpha and the omega, my fortress, my strong tower, my rock, my hiding place, the one who is and was and is to come….

Honestly… I can’t explain it but it changes my entire perspective when I focus on who he is.

My life and my problems seem insignificant compared to his magnificence, his holiness, his power…